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[Chara]

Today and yesterday have been really messed up days for me. Just yesterday I messed up just about my only chance of hooking up with this girl that I liked since the 8th grade because of my stupidity so I have been down lately because of that. You would think that I can come home, relax, and forget about how stuff is going on in my life but I cant.

Before my cousins have moved into my house early November my house was peaceful. It was just me and my mother so it was peaceful. But as soon as those irritating cousins of mine have moved in, life has been a living pain. They are both ghetto as hell and disrespectful. The younger one, aged 13, has stolen money from me and my mom on numerous occasions, eaten just about the entire refrigerator at night and deny doing it (she's on the big side), lied about just about everything, and whenever my sister comes home from college her clothes is taken by my cousin and she wars them. I mentioned earlier that my cousin is on the big side (over 200lbs) and my sister isnt that big, she only weighs about 149lbs, maybe less. So my cousin gives back my sister her clothes all streched out and smelly (my cousin doesn't take showers on an everday basis, like most people). That girl just isnt a good person. My mom tried to get her brother (the deliquent child's father) to take her back to New York but the same things happens every time. He comes down, talks to her, spends the night, and leaves her down here. Well, that is if he comes down here. Sometimes he just skips town for weeks to months at a time. One time he left my late grandfather at home himself. He was real sickly before he died and my uncle just left him there, alonem with no aid.

Now my other cousin that is a tad bit older, 16, but still younger than me isnt as disrepectful but is a pain in the ass. She is one of the girls that always want to be popular. That is ok with me but once she starts talking about my popularity is when I get pissed. I dont like talking on the phone at all so I dont have anyone call my house, I give them my AIM name instead. Now my cousin started calling me a loser and shit because I never recieve phone calls. I explained to her that I dont like talking on the phone but she just thought I was making that up. Just to get her to shut the fuck up I asked a few friends to come over and go somewhere, or hang out. That shut her up for a little while but she just started up again. I really hate that girl. Also one that that she does that really, absolutely pisses me off is that she acts like she's scared whenever she sees my face and then says "Your ugly face keeps on scaring me.". I know I am not ugly, girls talk to me on regular basis. Hell, I was even called a hunk of a man before and got my butt slapped a few times (I didn't even know girls slapped guy's butts). Earlier today she acted like she was scared and I found myself ready to punch her in the face. I literally grabbed her shirt and raised my fist, ready to punch her. I just was absolutely angry about what happened yesterday and earlier today, and she just put the icing on the cake. I didn't know what I was doing until I heard her scream. Then I thought "What am I doing?". So I went out for a walk in the rain and released my anger on a tree. That was about 15 min ago. Right now I am listening to "30 Minutes" by Tatu to soothe my anger.

What really is making me mad is howhaving these two damned children in my house is affecting my mother. She has to pay more for food, rent, and other things. My dad doesn't help her pay for anything. The only thing he pays for is my sister's tuition and that is a little amount at that. This is why I no longer live in a house, he stopped paying for stuff there. All this has pused my mom over the edge. She gets irritated more easily and she is starting to hate everything. One night I heard her crying in her room and it made me really angry. I just got up and went for a walk before I did something radical.

I dunno how long I can live in this house. I might end up moving with my dad but I don't want to leave my mom. If my two cousins' dad starts to act like a reasonable person and take care of his children I might stay home. But as long as these kids are here I cant stay. They are making my like too damn depressing and stressful. I am seriously going to talk about my mom getting rid of those two or me tomorrow morning. I cant take it anymore. I might just print out this post and give it to my mom to tell her how I feel about the current situation. I'm not one to just come up and tell people how I feel in my heart.

I don't know why I'm telling you people, though. Maybe because I cant talk to my friends about anything as deep as this or the fact that I dont really pour my heart out to people since I dont like poeple feeling pity for me. Or it could be that I have made a bond with you people here. I dont know. But what I do know is that I have told you people and now that I have finally told someone I feel better. I dont even care if anyone replies. I just had to get this off my chest.

[Jubei]

if you have something bottled up like that, its always best to let it out and talk about, no matter what the medium may be.

Sounds like ur having a hard time, and sadly all i can do is wish you luck with whatever you do

[Vicious_2003]

I can see your just kind of letting off steam but I will make a suggestion. Have your mom demand that both of them get after school jobs and pay there way. Hell it would keep them out of your hair for a good portion of the day and it would help to releave the financial burden . But of course that would recquire your mother to lay down the law and really be stern about it. Some people just cant do that..im not sure what kind of person your mother is though. Knowing me I would just treat them like dirt before they ever had the chance to do me any harm. And as far as them stressing my mother out id just go off on the both of them with some threats and demands of my own. Anyway good luck with that situation

[Pu the Owl]

Well Chara, this sounds like an irritating and difficult to manage situation. Obviously you have all the rights to be furious, but please try to focus your attention on other things. I'm not saying to pretend you have no problems, just try to ignore your cousins at least in some occasions. If they call you loser or other names, just try to reply showing you don't care. Or don't reply at all. In these cases the fact you get angry just make them feel important and willing to keep on bothering other people. For them it's probably a form of cheap entertainment. If I didn't get it wrong, they're both younger than you, and they're both very selfish and not very respectful. Well, this is enough to not take them into any consideration, unless they actually do anything really serious (like stealing money and such things you mentioned). Silly kids always like to call other people names, and punching one of the in them face won't give you satisfaction, nor this will stop their way of acting, probably. Just try to stay calm. As Vicious said, your mom should ask them, or their father, to pay for food and other expenses. The fact they're your cousins is not enough to justify your kind hospitality, especially considering their rude and careless behaviour. They probably need to understand they cannot rule a family which isn't even their own. Also, your mother probably should tell in clearer terms to their father you're not willing to have your family ruined because of them. If he cannot take care of his duties, then he surely cannot pretend you can replace him.

Just hope you can get rid of these problems very soon!
Cheer up! May the Force be with you!

[Azuma_Ninja]

Dude, that really sucks. It sounds like your going through a living hell. It's even worse that your mom is starting to suffer. I think talking to your mom is a good idea, that's the only way something is going to get done. I'm also sorry about chances with the girl you liked. I'm going through the exact same thing like that, I haven't screwed up yet but it's bound to happen. Hope everything works out for you though, dont lose hope.

[happy_doughnut]

I don't know if there's anything that I can say that would be put in better words than the ones already said.
Vicious, Fortune, and Azuma all gave you some very good advice, and not to mention encouraging words.

I know it can be difficult to *open up* to people at times. Hell, sometimes it proves to be nearly impossible. However, you should know that no matter what, there's always someone out there willing to help you, even if that help means listening only.
Keeping things like this, because this is a very nerve wrecking situation, inside of you will only lead to an eventual burst of anger, which you seem to be on the verge of fulfilling.

Like Fortune said, I know the words "try to not think about it" may sound to difficult to do, but it really is a good solution, especially considering the types of persons your cousins are.
Calling you names only shows their immaturity and stupidity.
If you show them how molest you are, it'll only make them feel the more grand. However, you musn't be too passive, or else you can wind up in another bad situation. Lay down the grounds for them; let them know that they're irritating you and that you aren't willing to take it. It's very likely that their responce will be a mockery of some sort, but at least you will have done your part.

It's a shame your mom has to endure problems that aren't even legitimately her own. It seems to me that the only one who desserves to put up with such nonsense is their father; not your mother. If for some reason she is willing to care for them, don't let her do it for free ! Make them haul their own weight around there. It's not fair that your mother has to work twice as hard for some teenagers whom are too lethargic to work for themselves. If they're going to be taking up space; make them pay for it.

Also, I'd like to suggest you speak with your mom directly. I know sometimes things are just much more difficult to express in words, but sometimes it's simply the best way. Try to console your mom and let her know how you feel, because only then will you reach a satisfying agreement.

I hope things turn out well for you, Chara. Just remember to not give up and to never lose hope

[ssjtrunks13]

Hey, Chara. I kinda know what you're talking about. It's hard for me to talk about stuff withother people also, it's just that I may talk even less than you do. I'm not sure what kind of advice I can give, I've never been in a situation that heavy.

I just hope things work out for you and your mom.

[Hadoken]

Chara, I think that your cousin's are complete asses, they obviously show no respect whatsoever to you or your mother, and I honestly don't think you two should put up with that type of behavior. But your mother is probably only letting them stay at your home because they are "family", and she sounds like a person with good morals, so I don't think she'd want to have to kick them out and seem like someone who doesnt care about "family", which would probably also make your uncle upset, even though he himself seems like a not so good person. If he were, he should be taking care of his own children, not your mother. Your cousins obviously enjoy taunting and tormenting you, even though they are younger(which again, is disrespectful), so I think that they need to be put where they belong, you have to find a way to show them who's the boss around the house. If they are being disrespectful enough to steal money, steal clothing, taunt you, and free-load off of your family, they are a little too relaxed and carefree, and I think your sister has been a bit passive about the borrowing of clothes too.. has she said anything to them about it? If she doesnt, they'll probably just continue to think that its ok to steal other's belongings. I would tell you to sit down with your mother and uncle and discuss the current situation, but from the sound of it, he seems as if he doesnt care about his own children, and is letting your mother take care of all the responsibility, while he goes who knows where. People have their limits, Chara, and I think your being pushed a little too far, with the problems your going through, you just dont need this type of BS from your cousins. You have to make it apparent to them that what they're doing is wrong, if you've been too passive in the past, they will think that they own the place and do whatever they want, you cannot allow that to happen. If you and your mother don't figure something out, thing's will probably just get worse. But I advise you not to threaten you will move out if she doesnt do something, because I think that will just make your mother feel worse than she already feels.. She probably feels the same way as you do, but with her being your mother, I dont think she will agree to kicking them out right away, unless she is pushed to the edge. So try to have a talk with your uncle, and if that doesnt work, you have your mother, who should be in charge of the house, to have something done with your cousins, they are still young, so I think that she'd legally be their guardian, since the father is not living with them, and when they live under her roof, they should have to listen to her. Perhaps there are some activities or groups that could keep them occupied after school? I'm not sure if this is helping you or not chara, but if you need to talk to someone, and dont' feel like discussing it with those you know in person, feel free to come onto here and explain it.

[MakgSnake]

Originally posted by Hadoken

so I think that they need to be put where they belong, you have to find a way to show them who's the boss around the house

That is so right man. I would totally agree with that, infact if I were you. I would be screaming the hell out on them and telling them to shut the f*ck up or they would seriously get it from me. You have to show them that this is your place. There are other ways to handle this situation too man....like Fortune said....ignore them which is good, just not my type of thing to do (especially after the way they are acting right now). So you have to be strict and have to make sure that they are scared of you, that when they enter a room, they think before even sitting down. That when they open the fridge to eat something, they think THRICE before having anything other then a glass of water. Trust me, you have to do this.....if I was there.....I would make sure they are afraid of me.....

But if the above personality is not what you are......then as others have mentioned in this thread you can go with that too. I hope everything gets better.......... take good care of your mom. Moms' are the best, and if someone hurts them......kill that person in my opinion.

[Vicious]

that just sucks

[Rei]

As the others said, Chara, you shall not them ruin your life and your family! You and the other members of the family shall show them some kind of authority, without being violent tho. And contact their father and tell him he must take care of his girls, 'cos he's the person to be blamed for this!

Good luck!

[Chara]

Thanks for your advice, people. I think I have pretty much sorted the problem out.

One night I just got real pissed off at what was going on here I just left the house and didnt come back till the next morning. I went over a freinds house for the night. At least that gave me some time to think. If I stayed at that house too long anger would just cloud all rational thoughts.

I came back all calm and quiet. My mom didnt say anything nor did my cousins. I just went into my room and fell asleep. The next morning I talked to my mom about why I left and how I thought of the current condition. She talked with her brother (thier father) and she said they will be gone at the end of June. That is when he should have his own place.

Now I didnt want to put up with thier stuff until they left. So when the older one said something to me I just blew up in her face. I believe I scared the piss out of her because she just sat there, stuck. Since I was in such a bad mood I went over to her sister and told her how things are going to be. She just was like shut up. That just made me even more angry. So I started telling her things about her hygiene and how she aint going to get anywhere in life with her current attitude. I didnt really get any point across there but I got her to shut up. I think I even got her to take showers.

Fuck that I'm not putting up with it anymore. When thier dad comes to take them away I'm going to make sure he takes them. Not just pull the usual come, give the girls a talk, and leave bs. They are leaving for good.

My mom shouldn't be the only one trying to sort things out. She has too many other things to worry about.

[Deathwatchz]

I guess that I am a much more bitter person when it comes to family. I have had to deal with shit like that before, but it was when my grandma came to live with us. She was 85 and from England, and she was so f&(*ing uptight about everything she made my life and my dad's life a living hell..... One day, she asked my dad if he could be off the phone before 9 cause she had to make a call, and he said "Ok". He was on the phone till 8:45, and we had plans to go biking, so i said "grandma needed to make a call, remember?" so he got off the phone. I went downstairs to tell her she could use the phone cause i got him off, and she started screaming in my face "you lied to him!! you little bastard!! what's wrong with you?" She had gotten so plastered she forgot she needed to use the phone. I just went off, told her "Go f&*^ yourself. You're such a drunk that you can't remember something you said an hour ago? Get your alcoholic A$$ in rehab!" stormed off to my room and blocked my door with my dresser, turned up my music to the loudest it could go and lay there till she stopped pounding on the door and went to sleep. If I was in a similar situation with those cousins of yours, i'd make thier lives a real problem every time they did something out of line. If the little one starts stealing stuff, make it so some of her stuff "dissapears", and with the clothes, borrow hers, wash them and let them shrink about 4 or 5 sizes and don't throw them in the dryer so that they get all moldy. With the other cousin, every time she gets an attitude, blow up on her and make her so damn scared of you, that she'll be afraid you'll kill her so she will keep her mouth shut. There isn't a definite chance that theyll be out of the house by then, believe me, stuff like this drags out, so just to get an insurance policy, make them know that the bulls^&* will NOT be tolerated. you may get grounded once in a while, but at least they will know that you will do the stuff even though you may be punished for it. Me & my bro used to beat the S%&^ out of each other on a daily basis and we'd get grounded all the time, but he knew that if he messd with me that i'd grab the biggest and heaviest thing in reach and bash him in the face with it, so he usually thought twice. LOL

wow dammm(5 million damms)mmmm that sucks. Well we have are sucky days. Wut can u do. Sometimes things happen. Maybe you should tell your mom or dad wuts on your mind. It hurts even more to keep everything in. If I were you id think happy thoughts. Like when all the crapy events end.