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Aug 23rd, 2002, 09:10 PM | #1 |
Every One Dies Alone
Joined: May 2002
Location: In the depths of existance where the hot magma flows.
Age: 37
Posts: 1,057
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Side effects: laughter, anger or confusion
A sign posted on a hospital bulletin board: "Research shows the first five minutes of life can be the most risky."
A hand-written note underneath: "The last five minutes aren't so hot either." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Q: What is the difference between a lawyer and a vulture? A: The vulture eventually lets go. ----------------------------------------------------------- How do you double the value of a Yugo? -- You fill it with gas. I walked in a bar the other day and ordered a double. -- The bartender brings out a guy who looks just like me. What is forty feet long and has eight teeth? -- The front row at a Willie Nelson concert. What's the difference between a lawyer and God? -- God doesn't think he's a lawyer. ------------------------------------------------------ Q: Why don't they have fireworks at Euro Disney? A: Because every time they shoot them off, the French try to surrender ------------------------------------------------------- A. Incontinence Hotline... Q. Can you hold, please? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Q. What's the definition of mixed emotions? A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- This is a great gag to pull on someone; Run in looking frantic. Quickly shout at the person "How tall is a penguin?" They usually say "What?" Again, ask the person "How tall is a penguin?" Almost everytime they will respond "1-2 feet tall." Collapse in a chair and say "Thank god, I thought I hit a nun!"
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All around me are familiar faces Worn out places Worn out faces Bright & early for the daily races Going nowhere Going nowhere Their tears R filling up their glasses No Xpression No Xpression Hide my head I want to drown my sorrows No 2morrow No 2morrow & I find it kindof funny I find it kindof sad. These dreams in which i'm dying, R the best I've ever had |
Aug 24th, 2002, 03:27 AM | #2 |
Dante May Cry
Joined: May 2002
Location: America's Guard of Honor: 82nd Airborne Division
Age: 40
Posts: 1,523
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LMAO I thought you were going to post some kind of complex question or something....
That was funny stuff Specially the first one.
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Aug 24th, 2002, 02:01 PM | #3 |
Now or Never
Joined: Jan 2002
Location: Zürich
Age: 42
Posts: 2,456
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*dies laughing*
I must take note of some of them in case I need to make someone laugh! |
Aug 24th, 2002, 03:31 PM | #4 |
.illustrated.thingy.
Joined: Mar 2002
Location: pixel-land
Age: 37
Posts: 2,576
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- theres some excellent ones there ^_^ - thanks for letting me laugh , also I heard a similar joke to one of those a while ago:
A man walks into a garage and says "I want a spark plug for a skoda" --- the garage guy looks at him and says : "yup. that sounds like a good swop" ^_^
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Aug 24th, 2002, 09:06 PM | #5 |
Every One Dies Alone
Joined: May 2002
Location: In the depths of existance where the hot magma flows.
Age: 37
Posts: 1,057
|
I think this is so funny, read the whole thing.
https://www.jokefrog.com/pic.shtml?0643.jpg These are okay... just look at the site https://www.jokefrog.com/abcd.shtml https://www.jokefrog.com/pic.shtml?0640.gif
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All around me are familiar faces Worn out places Worn out faces Bright & early for the daily races Going nowhere Going nowhere Their tears R filling up their glasses No Xpression No Xpression Hide my head I want to drown my sorrows No 2morrow No 2morrow & I find it kindof funny I find it kindof sad. These dreams in which i'm dying, R the best I've ever had |
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