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[Carlito]

Hmmm, let me guess... she wants to make her bf jealous or things like that? Good strategy, no boy resists to his girl's winking pics.

Seriously, it would make much more sense to post the picture in the user's pictures thread, on my opinion. Then, send a link to her bf and make him suffer. Just joking.

[fantasytiger]

lol thnaxs everyone one of the reasons i posted that up was because it was the best pic i could find of myself second its actually a bikini top third ever since the break up I have been putting myself down i have a low self esteem and when i think about it being with him was not helping it any. So I decided to do something completely different something daring I would never do you know live a little. All my friends say i look pretty but you know how friends are suppose to be nice thats what I always thought they were doing . Sorry deathwatch and yunadiva but now seeing everyones responce i am surprised and I relized it was his lost not mine

[Pu the Owl]

Originally posted by fantasytiger
All my friends say i look pretty but you know how friends are suppose to be nice thats what I always thought they were doing .

This is true. When your self-esteem is low friends' opinions just don't sound very convincing. And anyway, I don' see what's so upsetting in seeing a girl with a bikini top on. You can see tons everyday everywhere. If tiger isn't worried, there's nothing wrong in a bikini top in itself.

[Redpyramidhead]

Well, I am glad that you feel better about things now. I know what it's like to have a low self-esteem, especially when I was a teenager. I'm over a lot of it now, but it still gets to me. The point that I wanted to get to, though, was that... now that you yourself feel pretty...I mean try to find a different way of justifying good self-esteem to yourself...because if there is one thing I have learned over the years is that the best case for your own self-esteem and feeling better about who you are comes from within. Other people can help, but you have to take it to the next step and believe in yourself and not rely on the fact it was or wasn't said by someone else who doesn't really know you.

The only reason I say all this is because...and please do not take this the wrong way...it seems like you might be engaging in some kind of plan to make your ex feel jealous so that you may find a certain satisfaction in that. This is not a personal attack or anything...please don't misunderstand, but I've noticed a lot of women tend to try to do this to boost their self esteem after a breakup...the problem is though-atleast I don't believe- it can have a positive and lasting effect on true self-esteem at all.

WHat I am trying to say is...if you need that boost in self-esteem...look inwards and to friends and then apply that inwards and believe in yourself. You will be so glad you did it that way in the long run. Unfortunately, there are no shortcuts to it like making someone feel jealous. IF that's not what you are doing, forgive me for jumping to any conclusions.

Man...once I start ranting...

Anywayz...PEACE

_RED_ stuff

[Pu the Owl]

What you said Red is completely right, and I agree with you, but you see, you said you also were a teenager once... teenagers often find very relieving to be "aggressive" or "transgressive" or to appear like that in very particular situations. If that starts to be the habit to earn back your lost self-esteem whenever something unpleasant happens in your life, this becomes a negative or even dangerous thing for your ego (and for your person too). We don't know much about tiger's break up, and it's true there could be some intention to make her ex jealous with this action of posting the pic in a forum. But there are times in which even the most insignificant word or compliment can help you, especially if it's from strangers, persons who don't know you well enough to risk to not be objective. I mean, if you ask to the greatest part of mothers or friends "Do I look good?" they will probably end saying "Yes". Not because they're not sincere, but because they truly think that way, for their affection and love. It's not that this means they want to please you, but... an opinion coming from a stranger is something that sounds a lot more convincing in cases like these, when you know your friends wouln'd hurt you and your self-esteem is at the same time at the lowest levels - but you keep on thinking that after all you deserve more and you're a person of some worth! I'm sure tiger just wanted to have her moment to show she can go on after what happened to her lately. I'm sure she already knows she must count on herself and on her closest friends, that our posts here are not the ultimate way earn her self-esteem back. But you probably can't fully understand since you're not a girl, reading from others you're pretty and so on sometimes helps a lot

[Rei]

Originally posted by Panuru
But you probably can't fully understand since you're not a girl, reading from others you're pretty and so on sometimes helps a lot

This is sooo true! When you're low it's good to hear nice words coming from others also regarding your physical aspect! Makes you feel a lot better! BTW, fantasytiger looks fine to me. And bikinis are everywhere nowadays! I hope for you you're not receiving tons of private messages from people you don't know

[Deathwatchz]

oh, i dont think she has to worry about receiving too many unwanted pm's from strangers, but she IS gonna be getting a lot of pm's from people she knows..... lol. im gonna stop before my g/f kills me! you know i love you baby

[YunaDiva05]

No, love, I'm not gonna kill you. I'm just gonna make you suffer
I love you too baby

[jjmoohead]

awww, this is like my psycology class *stupid 5th year university classes taking up my life* and the next nancy drew novel all mixed into one. YEAH FOR STUFF!

All i know is that self confidence is always there. You know your good at something or that your style is ok, otherwise you wouldnt do it. For me its just the idea of being accepted. No body can change me into something different so rather then change into someone im not i wait for the people with the positive comments on the person i am.

It takes a lot longer to find someone like that then it does to choose friends. Those type of people come out of no where and they always make you happy, even when they make you mad.

[Redpyramidhead]

Originally posted by Panuru

But you probably can't fully understand since you're not a girl, reading from others you're pretty and so on sometimes helps a lot

You made a lot of good points. I was simply wondering if Fantasytyiger was feeling ok now and if she was all set with her self esteem which deathwatchz had mentioned was a little low right now, which is perfectly understandable. Like i said in my post, or hope I made clear was that I was on her side and hoped she would find the right way to boost her self esteem that would last. I believe you when you say that its different for girls and being told one's self looks good can probably go along way. That sounds reasonable to me cuz I have been friends with lots of girls over the years and also I think guys feel this to an extent, as well. If a girl i didnt know said i was good looking it would probably help make my day. I guess I just wasn't thinking about any of this when I said what I said. Oh man...I'm rambling again...

_RED_ stuff

[Gadzoox]

I still can't understand this; and I'm a girl!

My boyfriend just broke up with me and I had never felt that way about anyone before. It honestly physically hurt me when he said those words, BUT i'm not about to go post a half naked picture of myself in a suggestive pose on the internet to make myself feel better... that's fine if it really is helping you, but personally, I feel like this is degrading.

You have to realize that's what happened and its in the past, you are way better than he knows and he's missing out on a lot, too bad for him, so sad. You have to focus on the future, not dwell on the past. Life is too short to live being upset over some guy. (even if you still love them at the moment.)

Everything happens for a reason. Maybe next week you'll meet someone 200 000 times better, and you'll look back and wonder what you saw in that other guy. It could be next week, tomorrow, a year from now or even 10 years from now; however long it is, it WILL happen, you will meet the guy of your dreams someday. You have your whole life to live and your whole life to meet him. When it happens, it happens!

[fantasytiger]

I understand were everyone is coming from no I am not trying to make him jealous its just when someone leaves someone else with out a reason you begin to pick your flaws and blame it on them and since i have a big self esteem issue I thought it was because i did not look good enough so I just decided to post my pic for some other oppinions from people who have never seen me I am perfectly content with myself as a person i think i have a great personality but its been to my experience that if you did not look at least a little good you are going to get no were maybe I am just surronded by a$$ hoe$ but thats been my life now can you really blame me for having self esteem issues anyways I was just chillin at yuna's and she snapped it and it looked good so I posted it besides i had to give you guys the best pic I could since you all waited so patiently


Please do not be mistaken this has nothing to due with Neomarik and frankly I am getting tired of his name I will not be able to move on from this for the simple fact that i can not do what we did or share what we had with any one else because i will always feel as if I am betraying him its werid i understand Gadzooks what you are saying and you are intitled to your own oppionion , but you do not know me personally or the way my mind and heart works so to say that you can relate and compare this to ordinary teenage love scenario is kinda shallow because this goes way beyond that. I am not trying to snap or put anyone down. As for degrading like I said that pic was just snapped while we were playing with yunadivas new web cam and since it came out so well she suggested i post it and I said sure why the hell not this is not usually me I am very shy but lately I have not cared to much about what others think of me I have been more in this I do not give a shit mood. Plus in all honesty I really liked the pic I always lived my life by the rules always being told what to do and what not to do and I listin and took everyones judgement tooo personaly thats another reason i do not like myself if the picture is going to start some sexiest debate about degrading women or how its unappropriate then I'll just take another one the last thing i want is someone to be insulted or feel like it is degrading, but if no one else has a prob with it then i do not either. The pic was in pure fun and i really hate the fact that everyone automaticlly thinks it has something to do with my break up, or jealousy, or some hateful sceem for revenge because believe me Neomarik is as happy as a lark now so this pic won't faze him plus i do not hate him and wish him all the best. This pic will probably be tooken down sunday anyways because its not permanate i have bad timing maybe i should have waited a few more months b4 i posted it whatever. Thanxs again everyone for your input and advice and I hope this clears some things up

[Pu the Owl]

Gadzoox, degrading is a tough word... everyone reacts to what happens in their life in different ways, depending on their personality, on their age and so on. I wouldn't put a photo (whatever photo, not only a bikini one) on the internet after breaking up with my boyfriend to feel stronger or that I am being accepted either, though I said I understand those who do that and I can see why it can be helpful for them, and why it's helpful for them to hear words saying they are good looking. Still I wouldn't do the same, but that's because my personality tells me I wouldn't like to do it for myself. And you wouldn't do it probably for the same reasons, I suippose. If another person, like tiger here, has no problem doing so, I wouldn't say it's degrading, it's only her way to be. I could disagree with those girls who go to the disco every weekend with a pair of huge boots and not much more to cover their skin, but this doesn't mean they're necessarily degrading themselves because they want to feel pretty using that strategy or because that is their way to feel accepted. Age in this case counts a lot too, as I said. Zoox, you're older, and I am older too, but even if I wouldn't have done it in my teens either, I can see the action from a slightly different point of view if I think about the fact tiger is still a teenager. If you still need to do things like that when you're around 28 (no offence to those who are 28, I just picked up a random number ), you probably need to rethink about your way of dealing with problems, but at tiger's age it's nothing that terrible, really. There are many ways to really degrade oneself, and absolutely this is not the case. But that's just my opinion

[fantasytiger]

hey I am taking it down if anyone else wants to see it then fine I mail it to them or something people are taking my actions in putting this up totally the wrong way and I am really just not in a good mood and maybe its me taking things the wrong way i tend to be doing that lately but it seems as if people are taking this as a childish desperate atempt to make someone jealous or to make me feel good for ten seconds i just did this to see if I could stop worrying about my looks but its only just depressing me even more so 4get it maybe I'll post another pic in a few years when I "grow up" but for now I am just going to avoid pics for a while thanxs to everyone please do not feel bad its no ones fault

[Pu the Owl]

Tiger, nobody said you're childish. Acting without being constantly worried about others' opinions is a great thing and it's a quality of youngest people. When you grow up, worries grow stronger as well. You lose something. Being a teenager is not a fault. Acting like a person of your age which wants to throw away her worries for awhile is great thing too. This is to sum up what I said in my previous post, which you could have taken in a wrong way, maybe. Don't take people's words so seriously. Don't become obsessed by this whole question of being judged now. You did what you thought it was the best thing to do for you, because you liked it or because it was important for you. Whatever people can say to express their opinion, you only know what you wanted to do or say with your pic. Don't take it the wrong way and don't be influenced by the mood of the moment.

[Gadzoox]

Maybe I'm too sensitive that way... I just felt like Tiger was trying to sell her body to us, and not her personality. But I know what you are saying Panu, this whole thing just really shocked me.

I know it does make me feel good about myself when people say things to me about my appearance, and im flattered, but those words mean hardly anything unless you yourself feel that way too.

Who cares what the world thinks?

but you do not know me personally or the way my mind and heart works so to say that you can relate and compare this to ordinary teenage love scenario is kinda shallow because this goes way beyond that.

I didn't say that at all. I was giving you an example of my life and how I delt with things, because I THOUGHT this was about that and I THOUGHT it /might/ help you. Someone suggested thats why this was done and I went on that.

Don't take people's words so seriously. Don't become obsessed by this whole question of being judged now. You did what you thought it was the best thing to do for you, because you liked it or because it was important for you. Whatever people can say to express their opinion, you only know what you wanted to do or say with your pic. Don't take it the wrong way and don't be influenced by the mood of the moment.

Exactly. I've expressed my feelings towards this and I dont think of you as a bad person at all. I'm just shocked and can't understand /why/ you'd do something like this, but that's wholly my problem, not yours. Hell, maybe I'm just jealous of you!! Who knows, not even I do. Just don't worry about it so much.

[dan da man]

My comment before was supose to be a nice comment



(sorrrrrry)

[fantasytiger]

^it was

lol do not feel bad guys it was just bad timing on my part I know no one was trying to be mean or hurtful I am ok and I am not upset so relax all be happy

[Rei]

If you're ok and anything's fine, there's nothing to worry about then!

[neomarik]

didnt get to see it, but what ever it was, im sure you looked sexy