Quote:
Originally posted by jjmoohead
Wow this forum really expanded. I have a situation that might help a few of you and lets me vent some frustration.
A friend of mine, probably my best friend, just started seeing this guy a couple months ago, no more then 3 months ago. She has this thing in her head that by the time shes 23 she HAS TO HAVE 2 kids, and be married or she feels like shes failed herself. She is 19 now BTW, 20 in march. She just got out of a long term relationship that lasted about 3 years and they were talking about marriage and everything before they broke up. She just told me yesterday that she is moving in with this new guy and I feel like shes rushing it. The dude is a total loser and I hate him so much. because her head is set on having a family and getting married I think she going at this all wrong, she tells me its not about marrage and that they are just taking the next step cause she has to move out of her house now and figured why not in with him. I think shes making a huge mistake.
This is not the worst part. She asked me during the summer that when she gets married she wants me to be the dude that marries them. Like a priest, understand. I can do it, i looked into it. I tell you one thing though, if she marries this guy I won't do it. How do i tell her that though?
Shes doing this all to fast, she has only a high school education and 2 crappy jobs, she has no future going for herself. How does she expect to raise a family. My advise to you youngins thinking about marriage. WAIT! You have your entire life ahead of you, get an education beyond highschool, get a career, by a sweet car, get a nice house to live in and then invite a girl into it. Enjoy the little things in life before you go after the great big things.
Thats my 2 cents
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Man, just tell her stragith away how you feel about it. A true friend will argue and oppose to his friend if he (you) thinks she's making a huge mistake.
I think you really should tell her how you feel about the situation, exactly the way you think about it, in the most honest way possible, although I would not klet go of th e fact you think the guy is a loser, since that may make her think you don't want her to do that with the guy just because you don't like him, but because teh whole thing the chick is doing, is wrong.
And don't let the fear of losing her friendship as for refusing to marry her to him: that would be her fault and would prove she does not value your friendship the way she should.
Well, I'm not telling you you have to do that, but that is most likely what I would do in your place.
I wish you and her very good luck on that.