[BowevelJoe]

1.There once was a beaver, he was a really ugly fellow, so ugly he married a blind squirrel. He lived in a dam, an ugly dam that was so ugly it made people that saw it say stuff like "That sure is an ugly dam" and "Wheres my pineapple?" The beaver was a mean fellow with breath so reeky he was pulled over by the cops for doing 60 reeks in a 30 reek zone. He was once believed to be Richard Nixon and was moved into the Whitehouse. They say he was great. All he did all day was eat chairs and crap splinters all over the rugs. He left for home when they found the real Richard Nixon. He was found acting like a cow in a cattle ranch in Texas. They say that Bush was behind it, but Beaver Bob didnt care, he wanted to go eat some more wood and poop on things. That was the life of Bob the Beaver...

2.There was a smart man who lived long ago. He was the maker of many great inventions. He invented things like Human hand grenades, and things that did things, and some more things. Im not really sure that he was a smart man, but thats just me. Smart Ed is what they called him. He blew up 4 city blocks because he felt the urge to "mix the pretty blue chemicals with the neato green ones"He had an obsession with lighting peoples hair on fire, but this wasnt very fun for his friends because all he would do is laugh and spit on thier heads. Eventually he got married, but it didnt last long when he brought one of his human hand grenades home. He lived awhile, but listning to his dads saying "laughter is the best medicene" soon died of tuburculosis (sp? lol)