[Hadoken]

OMG... this is just weird...

The Jerry Springer Show : Episode 627 : "Marriage Meltdown!"


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[The crowd starts chanting "Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!"]

Jerry: Tonight on "The Jerry Springer Show" we have a particularly interesting episode! Hadoken is here to finally confess something to a long-time friend, SSSnake. So everyone, please put your hands together for Hadoken!

[The crowd whoops and hollers]

Jerry: Okay, now Hadoken you're here to talk about someone aren't you?

You: Yes.

Jerry: And what is this other person's name?

You: Miang.

[The crowd squeals with delight]

Jerry: Okay, okay, well Miang, is actually here tonight ...

[The crowd squeals]

Jerry: But first we have a surprise for you Hadoken, because as it happens there is someone else here to see you! So let's bring out ... Moudor!

You: What the HELL!!!

[Out of nowhere you pull out a Knife. Moudor reaches for the Chair. Out of the shadows Mena appears]

Mena: Wait everybody, wait!

Jerry: Yes, everybody let's just calm down for a moment here. First, tell us why you're here Moudor.

Moudor: Because I saw Hadoken and Mena making out at Fusion!

[The crowd goes absolutely insane]

Mena: That's a lie! I was home watching Simpsons!

Jerry: [raising his hands] Hold on, hold on, I'm missing the problem here ... what exactly is the problem Moudor?

Moudor: Because I've recently been taking part in a sexual relationship with SSSnake who has recently become engaged to Mena.

[The crowd hollers, screams and whoops in an orchestra of orgasmic excitement]

Jerry: Okay, okay. Well why don't we bring SSSnake out here because Hadoken had something that they needed to tell them anyway about ... Miang that's right!

SSSnake: [enters onto stage and saunters over towards you] What's the deal? I saw you outside getting it on with Miang! You know how I feel about Miang!

Mena: [screams] What? Why the hell did you ask me to marry you if you're in love with Miang!

SSSnake: Because I knew that I could never have Miang. But Hadoken promised me that they'd never hook up out of respect for my feelings!

Mena: What about respect for my feelings!

[Moudor walks suddenly across the stage, embracing SSSnake]

Moudor: Don't worry baby, you don't need any of them now that you have me.

[Again the crowd squeals]

Mena: Oh my God! Are you sick!?

[Mena runs across the room and wraps their arms around you tightly]

Mena: Hadoken take me away from all of this!

You: You see? That's the thing ... I'm ... well, I'm married ...

[The crowd does its bit]

Mena: Married?

[You nod]

Mena: Who the hell are you married to? When ... when did this happen? I don't understand!

You: The other day. In Vegas. I'm married to Miang.

SSSnake: [screaming] WHAT!!!

Jerry: [grinning widely, makes an enquiry] So ... did you have a nice wedding night?

Miang: [stepping back out onto center stage] Well we had sex 7 times if that's what you mean.

[The crowd squeals]

Jerry: Okay, okay. So let me get this all straight ... Hadoken is married to Miang who SSSnake has secretly been in love with for years and years. Now SSSnake has recently become engaged to Mena who was recently spotted kissing Hadoken in Fusion. Now on top of this, Moudor has just admitted to being in a sexual relationship with SSSnake.

Miang: That's right Jerry.

Jerry: [looking sternly into the camera] It's times like these that one has to wonder whether or not these people are aware that they are quite clinically insane. Perhaps we should be spending more on psychiatric health funds in this country, perhaps we should just ban Vegas to cut down on impulse marriages. Perhaps I should get a new job. Thanks for watching folks - it's been great - but for now, take care of yourselves ... and each other.

[Cue cheesy background music and fade to black]

edit: i misspelled mourdor... lol., sorry about that dude.
edit #2: btw, jerry springer was mayor of this city(cincinnati) a long time ago.