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I have a hard time thinking about fate and free will.
Events in my life have seemed to combine a mixture of the two.
One event that really stands out in my life, the death of a parent seems like something that was meant to happen (maybe because the entire experience felt so surreal for me during the entire time and for a year or two after), but coming to terms with my life and how it was going to change from that point on seemed liked pushing through something that was already set out for me, kind of like claiming a bit of free will.
Working through the pain and getting out of a personal downward spiral seemed like an enormous exercise of free will, something that certainly didn't feel pre-ordained, or set out for me already.
Some people might argue that whatever you do, no matter what you think about it is fate. It could've been fate to move on from a big event, but it felt more like I was exercising free will against fate.
In the book Timequake by Kurt Vonnegut, one of his characters, Kilgore Trout is stuck in a repeating "timequake" where he can tell what will happen in the next ten years, but is powerless to alter it, until near the end he breaks free from it, and helps others out of it.
I think that free will and fate both exist, alongside each other, and fate is more of an "auto-pilot" setting for our lives. Free will is almost an act of rebellion or determination against that guiding force, that (if we work hard enough on it) can break through it, and change what has already been layed on the table for us.
I don't know how relevant all of that is, but I hope it makes some sort of sense in the end.
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