Oh....wait a minute.....are you telling me you've got your eye on someone?
And all this time I thought you didn't have anyone on your mind. Well, not to be nosy, but could you tell me what she's like? And, if she rejects you, it doesn't mean it's you. Okay? Just understand that! If you think you may be in love with her, (I'm only saying this because the way you're talking about nearly dying if she rejected you....you've got it bad) but be warned....it might not be love, it might be just infacuation. I'm not trying to bring your hopes down, I'm just telling you. If you think you're in love, great, I just don't want you to go off committing suicide because you think this girl is the only one for you and you'll never find anyone else.