[merylsilverburg]

Originally Posted by Faile

It's a sad day when you realise that your parents aren't gods.

It's not always easy to admit, believe, or see that your parents has flaws. However, I think this is also when you realize you're an adult. The ability to see the faults within your parents is a sign of maturity and a sign of using your own true judgement. This is not always a bad thing...I first discovered this in my teenage years and it was sort of a good feeling.

Beretta, I'm sorry about your situation. The illnesses that has afflicted your mother one after the other is incredibly difficult to bear. It's hard to share these sort of things because on one hand, you want to release your feelings but on the other hand, it seems pointless to do so. But it's good that you did because it does relieve some of the pain you're feeling, even for a short while.

Also, your hiding away or playing games is not something to be ashamed of. Everyone going through hard times need to get away from it all, again, even if it's for a short while. During a certain bad year, my sister used to be away from home for long hours into the night. After school, she'd just go out with her friends or hide away at the library to do work or relax. I understand your situation of not being able to "run away" because I couldn't either. I was very young then, so I had to stay home. I would watch my mother fall into pits of depression or encounter moments when my mom and dad would start fighting violently, throwing things at each other, all that stuff. It's hard to run away when you really can't so I would play games too or invent imaginary friends (right, I'm a dork ) just to make things easier. So, it's natural to want to escape so you shouldn't apologize for your absence or feeling odd for escaping through games, books, or writing stories.

What Harry had said about your family moments is actually quite true. It's rare to hear stories of close families nowadays so your stories of your family moments are great (especially to those with broken households) and it seems like you guys will get through anything because of your closeness. Also, this is very important (at least to me): your mother is going through tough things. But, I think it's great that, even though you may not think you're being effective enough, your mother has actually attempted to stop her acts. Why? Because of you. She actually loves and cares about you enough to realize that her ways are putting a burden on you. So, even though her manic state can make her uncontrollable, she is actually and has attempted to try to fight against this. So, I hope this brings you a bit of comfort to know that your mother is still aware of you and your feelings. So very rare.

I've heard somewhere that harsh things are given to those who are the strongest. Well, I don't know if this is necessarily true or not but if we are to believe this, then I believe that this situation, while unfair to the extreme, is an important sign of your worth. Despite all of this, I think you're a very strong person because you're still doing incredibly well over these years and I know that you and your family will be able to get through this, though it may not seem like it now.

I'm glad to hear that things have slightly looked up. Don't be afraid to share again once in a while because, as you can already see, no one is judging you and has given you great comforting words. So share next time you need to release your emotions.