[Redpyramidhead]

One of the biggest things I can think of is what I said that caused the split up of me and an ex girl. I got the feeling she didnt care enough about me or took me for granted. So I said to her after visiting her the last weekend I ever saw her...I was like... well we had an argument or something... and then we were quiet for a long time... then I said something like "what if I were to go out the door right now? would you care enough to stop me? do you love me enough to stop me from going out this door and knowing that I might not ever come see you again?" And after that was said...it was too late to take it back... and I saw no look of longing her eyes for me to stay... in fact I got more of a "just leave" in cold response. It was too late... the cat was let out of the bag that she no longer felt the same way about me because the instant i said what I said she knew she could not lie to me cuz she at least cared that much. I wondered for a long time if I had never said it if we had worked things out more rationally or whatever, but with time I came to realize that me and her would not have worked, and even though I missed her like hell after that for quite a while... I finally realized I had been falling out of love with her, too... which leads me to believe I never had been.

Sometimes, people take things their friends or significant others say too seriously and don't talk to eachother for a long time over these things that are said and some of these relationships are forever broken...over the world's biggest problem...miscommunication. Other times, the things people say really do sometimes represent a deeper resentment that the other person catches onto but the one who said it does not and is left wondering why te friendship or whatever ended...however a warning to people, especially woman, who especially tend to search for hidden meanings in everything a guy says... you are still missing the point... the fact that we would only say such a thing out of anger is because we give enough of a fuck about you to care about your emotions and feelings. That is often times the truth behind things that are ONLY said out of anger or incredible frustration and anxiety. We are all human. And we all still need eachother even after all is said and done. PEACE

I leave you with a quote:

"Hadda be shouted in the basement where Uncle's were fighting..."
From the poem "Hadda be playin on a jukebox," by Allen Ginsburg



_RED_ stuff