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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 09:25 AM   #2
Redpyramidhead
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Joined: Sep 2002
Location: Restless dreams...
Age: 45
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Fantasytiger, this is a refreshing poem to read because of the style it is written in. The whole recurring theme you include "Let me...." is very effective in bring your anger to life in the ears of the audience. When you say

Let me choke on my words so the never make it past my lips...

It's almost like I can almost hear you trying to whisper them forcefully as I'm reading the lines. Very effective.

_RED_ stuff
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"..loathsome laughing, mixed with such a cry as no man has heard save for in the phlegathon of unrelatable nightmares; a cry wherein reverberated the horror and anguish of a haunted lifetime packed into one atrocious moment..."
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