Go For The Gold, Or Stay With The Old?
 

Okay, here's a question. How do you know whether or not you should try taking a friendship to another level? In a situation where you have a friend, someone who you find yourself able to get along with, and someone who you know enjoys your company, as do you, and a person who you really like, but you don't necessarily have feelings for this person. More like infatuated. Kind of going along the lines of this little chart:

Like - What every person has for another usually just by looks, don't necessarily even have to know this person. Just someone who you see and all of the sudden you like what you see.

Really Like - A bit more than like, as in, you actually have an occasional thought toward this person other than when it's just by first glance. Usually somewhere at a social, or even a friend level.

Infatuated - Not only do you think about this person, perhaps too much, but you'd give anything to go out with this person. (After infatuation, you either continue down the scale, or you turn to another path called obbsesion, which is not going to be listed.)

To Have Feelings For - Where you find that you actually have an emotional bond for a person, and when you think of going out with this person, you actually plan on taking it somewhere in the near future

Strong Feelings - Where most high schoolers think they are in love, but actually it's just blind love, or very strong feelings for someone

Love - The strongest emotion someone can have for a person.

Being "in" love - Not only having a love for someone, but the other returnes the feelings.

Now let's say you are infatuated with a specific person, and you feel that you may actually be developing feelings for this person. Do you risk taking the chanse, and going for the gold, or stay it safe and continue an already very enjoyable and secure friendship? And imagine a friendship that hasn't necessarily been very long. Like 3-4 months. And in this situation, you feel that the idea of you ever really getting anywhere with this person isn't really possible. But you do have a friendship that you want very badly to maybe become something more.

What are your opinions?

Sounds like my situation with a certain someone before I had moved, but I had known her for longer than 4 months. By that time I had feelings for her and it seemed maybe she felt the same thing, but when I moved that was shattered and I should have got her number or at least told her where I was going.

So, I say get her contact information before something happens, if you haven't got it already. Then just see how things go and maybe sometime ask her what how she feels about your guys' current situation.

First of all, depends: if I see the fact I'm infatuated can ruin friendship, I prefer to know exactly what the other person thinks about me and if this person has similar feelings (infatuation too, or more). There are persons who are not suspicious at all when it comes to these things, so when you let them know or when they understand, they become upset and change perspectives and sometimes this can ruin the friendship completely, since they don't want to keep on seeing you as they used to. They become cold or they even try to avoid any contact with you, or they simply keep the relation on a more superficial level for fear of becoming too deeply involved. I think sometimes, also depending on the person you're talking about, it's really important to know others' feelings to not risk to ruin a precious friendship.

i agree with ssj, you should tell the person how you feel. if things work out you may really develop feelings for this person. thest thing i can see hapening is her saying..."i dont want to ruin our friendship" then you ate stuck in the friend zone..man i hate the friend zone:mad: i would saygo for it, its better than never knowing.

It depends on how long you have known this person how long have you been friends two things you need to take into consideration befor you do anything

1. If you have been friends with this person for a while then you should be able to tell this person how you feel and if this person is any kinda of a friend they will be completely honest to you and if you two are really good friends then it should not really strenghten or weaken the friendship

2. If its an infatuation then that could make things ackward due to the fact that its not a little crush you could easily get over with time its a desire and then you would have to weigh the options and come to agreement on wiehter or not the friendship is worth more to you. Or if you think you could have a real relationship

My advice would be to read your friends emotions how they act toward you and how much they trust you also look for physical sign's if there are any real obvious sign's that this person feels the same then by all means go for it ,but if its unsure I would have to say hold off. Another good way to find were you stand with this person is to ask them what they think of you as a person and what you mean to them.

;)

I'd just ask them how they felt about me.

Well i've been in this situation once,and it worked for me because i've waited until i was sure of his feelings i had to wait like a year or so ,until he finaly told me that he had feelings for me ,it didn't last long (we were boyfriend-girlfriend just a couple of weeks but i'm not sorry for waitting)....
Anyway my advice to you is that you wait until you're sur of your feelings and her's before you take any action you may ruin something for going 2 fast.