Mad- Humanity as a Hole.....in the ground

[MADRUCKIS]

I usually just leave rants in all different places because I like to get a wide range of perpectives on thing so.....here ya go.
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It doesn’t take much for me to think of things that are inappropriate. But the reason I think of these things is because humans are inappropriate by nature. It’s a horrible thing to say, but like the great play on Broadway “Avenue Q” sings in one of its songs, we’re all a little bit racist. We’re all a little bit naive, politically incorrect, and insensitive as well. The only difference is that we don’t openly say it and, instead, internalize it within the confines of our head because, as everyone knows, it’s the safest place for inappropriate things. Or is it? In actuality, even if we do internalize the emotion, it can be read in other ways through body language, speech pattern, or even just in how you plan your Saturday Friday night. But I’ll come back to that.
Here’s something inappropriate. I went to a public bathroom in a theater the other day (40 year old Virgin, go see it). I had a bag in my left hand and didn’t want to place it on the ground of the urinal so I held it. With my right hand, I “assisted” myself out of my pants and used that one hand to man the hose. Being done, I managed to hold my pants with some of my left hand while “assisting” myself back in with my right. I approach the sink and I still don’t want to put down the bag so I decide
“I’ll wash one hand, then the other.”
But I dawns on me that I only used one hand during the process. So I only wash one hand. Then I only dry one hand. I feel the odd stare of guy on me as I do this and I walk out like “WTF was that about?” Well its simple to see his problem with my action. I only washed one hand when I went to the bathroom, which is gross right. But is it if you only use one hand while the other only came in contact with pants you touch every other second anyway? It was a real problem I tried my best to understand…I still don’t to be honest but shit, why do things have to be so difficult.
Its like the “every other/corner” rule guys have at urinals. If there are six urinals the one on the far right (#6) is being used, the next man who enters will pick the next over (#4) or even the first. If another man enters he picks one of the gaps as well. But I once entered a bathroom with 4 urinals. 4! With no stalls! And yes, #4 and #1 were occupied because of course, “every other/corners” rule was observed. So here I am standing there like an idiot weighing my options on who I want to pee next to. And I realize, it’s the silliest question to ask yourself. You’re looking at both men like your trying to choose a player for a pickup game. You’re basically picking a pee partner. WTF are we!?!
It was my initial reaction to question this.
Now, something as whimsical as potty humor might be good enough to have you laugh on human behavior. But there’s ugliness too. Now I wrote in my blog once about looking up at skyscrapers and thinking “Someone is having sex right now behind one of those windows.” I still do that nowadays. But something occurred to me yesterday. I was planning to celebrate my first half of my book being completed and my re-entry into school this weekend by hitting a club with my friends. But suddenly, Katrina hit and I’ve been mesmerized by it-the stories and accounts of the state of humanity down there….its repercussions all over the country. It fodder for a story I got inspired to write this week (yes another book idea for the future). I felt overwhelmed by the whole thing….its a state of disaster caused by a natural occurrence. Almost out of the bible, a city known for the sins that happen on a famous street gets crushed and tattered, basically eliminated by an unstoppable force. Calling it Babylon is farfetched, I know….and yet creepy. But it took its toll on me…enough to say
“I’m going to go party and drink and grind on women while people are suffering to the highest degree, not in some foreign country I cant find on a map without help, but in my own country; in a state I flew by just last week?” I lost the will to party.
I explained my sudden change of heart to another smart mind and she said “Of course I should go party.” It dawned on me that the last calamity of that caliber I experienced …..the only…….was 9/11 and I suddenly became disgusted. I asked “Do you think that people partied and got drunk and went about their daily lives in new Orleans when pictures of the Towers falling were still filling the tube? She easily said “Yes. It didn’t affect them.”
It was a horrible thing to say, but isn’t that where we all go wrong? Isn’t that why 9/11 happened in the first place? Our newspapers filled with titles that read
12 dead in bomb blast in Ghaza strip
Suicide bombers destroy building during a rush hour day
And we shrugged and said….”Pour me another drink!” brushing it aside until we saw people running with soot covered faces for days and weeks after it happened. I couldn’t do anything for a while after…couldn’t write, lost my sex drive, slept differently…I changed. I reset back into my ways a few months later but damn…I thought the other day of the kid turning off the TV while the 9/11 press rolled on, in some other state, trying to hit up a party so he could get laid. We were still plucking the bodies from the rubble while he bit the wrapper of his condom.
And its weird because even as I type this, I still see it both ways.
“That’s an inappropriate thing to be caring about when someone a state down or a few states down just lost their parents, child, family, loved one.”
“Its fucked up but why should it mean that I don’t do things and live my life while I still have it. Its not like I don’t care but what can I really do other than donate and pray?”

So yeah, I’m going to go party because…I deserve it. Last true weekend of vaca, my book block is done and my life’s work is being completed, and I just need to release for the sake of release. But the main reason is because I can because I’m an inappropriate, insensitive human being who acknowledges this and still not care. I cant do anything more than to live my life

Whether it be a truth or a lie, I still ranted my way this far for you to read. So thanks anyway.

[merylsilverburg]

It doesn’t take much for me to think of things that are inappropriate. But the reason I think of these things is because humans are inappropriate by nature. It’s a horrible thing to say, but like the great play on Broadway “Avenue Q” sings in one of its songs, we’re all a little bit racist. We’re all a little bit naive, politically incorrect, and insensitive as well.

It's not inappropriate for you to think of humans that way because, well, we humans are that way. No offense to those who are feeling miffed by what I just said, but it's true.

The only difference is that we don’t openly say it and, instead, internalize it within the confines of our head because, as everyone knows, it’s the safest place for inappropriate things. Or is it? In actuality, even if we do internalize the emotion, it can be read in other ways through body language, speech pattern, or even just in how you plan your Saturday Friday night. But I’ll come back to that.

But of course - body language, speech, facial expressions, and gestures are giveaways to what we feel in our mind. For example, a person can say/think, "Oh, I'm not racist at all, I feel bad when someone gets discriminated or prejudiced." But when getting on the bus and it's completely packed except one seat next to a Black/Asian/Hispanic person, it's like "Hmm...maybe I'll just stand." :sarcasm:

I only washed one hand when I went to the bathroom, which is gross right. But is it if you only use one hand while the other only came in contact with pants you touch every other second anyway?

Well, considering the guy didn't exactly see you during your process, the guy wouldn't know whether you used both hands or just one. So, since the guy has no idea, he can only assume the worst, hehe. :right: But of course, since he didn't know anything about the process, he had no right to "judge" you when you were washing your hands. But, that's human nature unfortunately.

Its like the “every other/corner” rule guys have at urinals. If there are six urinals the one on the far right (#6) is being used, the next man who enters will pick the next over (#4) or even the first. If another man enters he picks one of the gaps as well. But I once entered a bathroom with 4 urinals. 4! With no stalls! And yes, #4 and #1 were occupied because of course, “every other/corners” rule was observed. So here I am standing there like an idiot weighing my options on who I want to pee next to. And I realize, it’s the silliest question to ask yourself. You’re looking at both men like your trying to choose a player for a pickup game. You’re basically picking a pee partner. WTF are we!?!

I think it's all because we just feel uncomfortable...we feel uncomfortable with other humans, yet we need human interaction or relationships - I hope I'm making sense. All in all, people are just really judgemental I think...and if they're not, they're just very carefree and very "Let's-just-get-this-over-with-I-don't-care-what-you-think" sort of attitude. I mean, the whole "urinal process" you explained is exactly like how I pick my checkout-lanes at stores. If I go to Best Buy, for example, and there's only 4 lanes open, I study the cashiers very carefully. At Lane 1, there's a ditzy-looking girl who takes seemingly forever ringing someone up. Then there's Lane 3 and it's another girl who has a judgemental and lazy (my favorite :sarcasm:) type of attitude who's also taking forever to ring someone up because lifting that one videogame would just kill her or something. At Lane 2 and 4 ,there's condescending pricks except the one at Lane 2 is more of that "I'm-smarter-than-all-you-dumbasses" type who's likely to pressure you to subscribe to this magazine or that magazine, while Lane 4 is more of that "I'm-so-hot-all-the-girls-love-me" and would stare at the uglier girls thinking "Why the hell did you pick my lane, do you not see how ugly you are?" sort of thinking and of course all the good-looking girls are flocking to his lane. Okay, so who do I choose? If I'm in a hurry that day, I'll go to Lane 4 and if I have time, I'll go to Lane 1 and if I have no choice, I'll go to Lane 2 or 3. I choose Lane 4 as my "rush" choice only because I know that pretty-pansy boy would try to speed up my ringing process so I can get my ugly mug outta his face. So, hey, I win in the end. :D But yeah, we're all judgemental at least one point in our lives, it sucks but it happens.

I explained my sudden change of heart to another smart mind and she said “Of course I should go party.” It dawned on me that the last calamity of that caliber I experienced …..the only…….was 9/11 and I suddenly became disgusted. I asked “Do you think that people partied and got drunk and went about their daily lives in new Orleans when pictures of the Towers falling were still filling the tube? She easily said “Yes. It didn’t affect them.”
It was a horrible thing to say, but isn’t that where we all go wrong? Isn’t that why 9/11 happened in the first place? Our newspapers filled with titles that read
12 dead in bomb blast in Ghaza strip
Suicide bombers destroy building during a rush hour day
And we shrugged and said….”Pour me another drink!” brushing it aside until we saw people running with soot covered faces for days and weeks after it happened. I couldn’t do anything for a while after…couldn’t write, lost my sex drive, slept differently…I changed. I reset back into my ways a few months later but damn…I thought the other day of the kid turning off the TV while the 9/11 press rolled on, in some other state, trying to hit up a party so he could get laid. We were still plucking the bodies from the rubble while he bit the wrapper of his condom.
And its weird because even as I type this, I still see it both ways.
“That’s an inappropriate thing to be caring about when someone a state down or a few states down just lost their parents, child, family, loved one.”
“Its fucked up but why should it mean that I don’t do things and live my life while I still have it. Its not like I don’t care but what can I really do other than donate and pray?”

So yeah, I’m going to go party because…I deserve it.

Well dude, you just answered your own question right there and seeing how you went to the party just shows that you are, in fact, human. You did at least acknowledge the flaw in your human nature and this only shows that you are at least aware that you are this way and are somewhat ashamed of it but aware of it. You know that some people don't even know their own flaws or their bad habits or their evil/dark side? That makes me irritated but that's a whole other story. I mean, you went to the party despite feeling guilty about the Katrina situation but if you had stayed home to "mourn" and "grieve" but deep down you really want to go to that party, it would've been hypocritical and your "mourning" would've not be sincere. So, you were being truthful to yourself. Like what your friend said about the 9/11 situation: people continued to party because it didn't affect them and so rightly so....it didn't affect them, it has nothing to do with them, so why should they grieve or feel sad? But here's the real big kicker: humans are selfish. Let's just say the exact same thing happened in their own hometown, those people who went out and partied during the 9/11 thing would've been like "Omigawd! How can people party during our crisis, don't they know that we've just been affected by this HUGE thing?!" That's the way it is. And I think what you're discussing MAD in this thread has already been shown somewhat in that movie "Collateral", have you seen it? I enjoyed it immensely, it was a great film. Foxx's character feels shocked and appalled when Cruise kills that guy in that apartment whom fell on Foxx's taxi but yet Cruise counters with "Did you know this guy? Do you know his family, his past, etc." and since Foxx didn't know this guy, why should he feel sad about this man? It's so very true. There's only a few rare people who would genuinely feel sorrow, sadness, anger, etc. towards all the horrible circumstances/situations that occur in life and would genuinely mourn or grieve or become pro-active in such events. But, like I said, they're the very rare and very sensitive people and while some would be go "Wow, what a loser" you have to give these rare people credit for their emotions and thoughts because they are the ones being genuine about it rather than some person saying "Awww....I feel so bad!" but doesn't really care. Unfortunately, being this way has a downside because these people tend to be the ones who are "pure" in thought and believe that everyone in the world are still "innocent" and "good" which could not be more true. My mom is one of these people; she thinks everyone in the world are such innocent little things and it's only when she gets, pardon my expression, screwed over, then she goes off and rants to me "I cannot believe that person was like that, omigawd!" and I'm just sitting there thinking "What'd you expect, mom?" :sarcasm: But yet, when a calamity happens, such as the 9/11, the Tsunami, or the Katrina, she genuinely felt sorry for all those people and did cry for a whole day.

Whether it be a truth or a lie, I still ranted my way this far for you to read. So thanks anyway.

I don't really see this as a rant but rather a "guilty confession" sort of thing. It's like you felt so guilty for going to the party, but you had a reason or explanation, so you decided to create this whole thing to explain your reasons so that you can "relieve your conscience" so to speak.