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[Cannibal Clown]

this is the begining of a very ong fan fic combining silent hill 2, metal gear solid 2, halo, and some other misc. I'm only posting the silent hill part, because for one, it'd be way too long for me to post it all, and two, there is a lot of profanity, and coarse language, and i'm afraid that with just this, i'll probally get some bad pm's from the admids. But it's mainly just language, there isn't any porn or anything like that. So here it is, read it while you can.


James: Where am I? Is this where I was told to be? Is this, Silent Hill?

James looks down at a note, and begins reading it.

James: Damn woman, after all these years she finally decides to write me, saying that I owe her some quality time, like a f*cking picnic or something. And the fact that she’s been dead all this time makes the whole idea even weirder. But hell, might as well. Got nothing better to do this weekend anyway.

James continues down the foggy road.

James: Damn fog, can’t see sh*t. What the hell does Mary want to meet me here on a day like this, can’t see a thing, cold as hell, and no large breasted women anywhere. This is gay!

Then James sees a woman in the distance, leaning on a railing.

James: Hey you! Do you know where I can find a certain somebody?

The girl turns and looks at James.

Angela: Who the hell are you? Do I know you?

James: No ma’am, my name is James, and I’m looking for my *****, Mary. Have you seen her anywhere?

Angela: What do I look like, your God damn tour guide? How the hell should I know where your stupid wh*re is?

James: No I was just wondering. By your outfit, it looks like you get around a lot, if you know what I mean, and I figured that if there was some info about this place that I needed to know, perhaps you would be the one to ask.

Angela: Are you implying that I’m a corner player! Who the hell do you think you are, saying that to me!

James: Sorry, didn’t mean anything personal, just thought that maybe, later we might, well after I find Mary, perhaps, well, you know.

Angela: Get the f*ck away from me! Find your own pleasure b*tch. But I won’t be part of your little perverted game!

Angela slaps James across the face, and James begins to blush.

James: So you like it rough ey?


Angela: Ahhh! Get the hell away from me you filthy son of a b*tch! Here, take this and leave me alone!

Angela throws a map of the town to James and spits on his face. James licks the spit up with his tongue and smiles.

James: Mmmmm, just like mother made.

Angela: Ahhh! God damn you, I can’t take this shit anymore, I’m getting the hell out of here!

Angela runs away in disgust.

James: What got her panties in a twist? Oh well, I got a map, sweet ass! Now according to this, if I follow this road, I’ll lead me to a trail and into the main part of town. Maybe there I can find someone who can help me out.

James follows down the road and then cuts into the trail. He goes down it, and finds himself going down a steep stairway in the hill. At the bottom he sees a tunnel deep into the fog, and a strange figure moving around inside it.

James: Hey, perhaps that person over there can help me find my way. I got lost in this damn fog already. Hey sir! Sir, can you help me with something?

James runs to the tunnel, and sees that the figure isn’t what he expected.

James: What the hell! Mother? Wait, no that’s not it, you’re not my mother, you look more like my dog, but with arms, and all naked like. What kinda sicko are you?

Creature: Gargle gargle gargle.

James: What was that, I can’t understand what you’re saying?

Creature: Gargle, gargle, blippity bloop. Raaarrrhhhh!!!! Yicky yicky soopy doop aaarrrgggg!!!!

The creature stands up somewhat straight and a bunch of hot acidy sh*t sprays out of the creature’s stomach.

James: Ahhh, what the f*ck was that? It burns, Ahhhhhh!!!!!!

Creature: Garlgle gargle.

James: Fine, be that way you little b*stard!

The creature sprays him again.

James: Ahh, knock that sh*t off you ****! Fine, I’ll kick your ass now!

James kicks the creature in the head, causing it to fall down; he then grabs a big stick and starts whacking it over the head multiple times.

James: You like that you little c*ck sucker! Time to die now punk!

Creature: Gargle gargle!

Then the creature falls down and dies.

James: Well that takes care of that. Now back to the map, if I follow this road, it should lead me to the down town area.

James continues down the road, with his trusty stick in hand. He sees a little red sheet of paper on the ground. He goes up to it and picks it up.

James: What’s this? It’s nothing more than a stupid red sheet of paper.

All of the sudden the red ink on the paper engulfs the entire area, now he sees nothing but red, and a voice from the sky calls to him.

Voice: Would you like to save now James?

James: What the f*ck is that supposes to mean?

Voice: Click on one of the options you stupid dumb f*ck!

Two large floating icons appear in front of him, one saying “SAVE” the other saying “CANCEL” Above it are a few words floating in the air saying “Are you sure you want to save?” He clicks on the “SAVE” button, then the words change to “Are you sure you want to overwrite this save file?”

James: God damn it woman, do you have to ask me all the useless questions?

Voice: Just answer the f*cking question you ass!

James clicks on the yes button.

James: There, it’s saved! Now get me out of here!

All of the sudden the red is gone and he finds himself back in the roadway, and a truck runs him over out of nowhere. Then in huge red bloody letters above him it says “GAME OVER”

James: What the f*ck just happened?!

Voice: Now you’re glad you saved aren’t you?

James: What do I do now? How do I get back, I still need to find Mary.

Voice: Click on the damn continue button you moron!

James: Oh, okay.

He clicks on the continue button and is back where he was before. Then all of the sudden he gets run over by the same truck.

James: What the hell, it happened again!

Voice: My God you are a dumb ass! Next time don’t get hit by the f*cking truck!

James: Oh, okay.

He clicks on the button again and quickly jumps to the side and avoids the truck, but accidentally falls off a cliff which was to his left. James then sees his body plummet to the ground in third person. And the same words pop up again. “GAME OVER”

James: God damn it!

He quickly presses the continue button again and jumps to the right this time. He finds himself on a sidewalk, and a big ugly dog bites his arm, a dog which looks just like the human like zombie which attacked him earlier.

James: Ahhhh! That hurts! Damn dog!

James then takes his stick and starts beating the sh*t out of the dog. Smashing the wood into the animals head over and over, till the dog yelps and falls to the ground.

James: Stupid dog. Now my heart’s racing and a meter that seems to be floating in the air to my left is all red and sh*t.

Voice: Use your health kit and heal yourself stupid!

James: Oh, okay.

James does so.

James: Hey that feels really good. I’m gonna do it again.

He does it again and again, until the feeling leaves.

James: Hey, what the hell happened? Where’s that feeling, it’s not working anymore?

Voice: You idiot! Those were your health kits, you need those to survive you ****. Now you wasted them all. So you’re screwed.

James: Really? Sh*t! Oh well, better just try really hard without getting hurt.

Then another dog comes at him and starts gnawing at his arm, and another dog joins in.

James: Ahhh! That hurts!

He takes his stick and starts swinging it at the two dogs, but he dies before killing either of them. He sees the game over thingy appear over head.

James: Sh*t!!!!!!!

He then presses the button and finds himself back to where he was before. He sees the truck coming at him and jumps to the right.

James: Son of a b*tch! I gotta start from all the way back here again! Damn it! Ah the hell with it, I’m just gonna start running through all of this sh*t!

Voice: That’s what happens when you waste all of your health you idiot!

James ignores the voice and starts running down the road, not seeing where he’s going because the fog is too thick. He sees the road and the intersections as he passes them by. He keeps looking at his map, trying to get to the bridge that gets to the hotel which Mary told him to meet her at. Then all of the sudden he runs into a pole and falls down.

James: Oww, shit that hurt! Damn pole, if this fog wasn’t soo thick I might have seen that.

Voice: Or perhaps if you were looking where you were going, you may have seen that pole you imbecile.

James: Would you shut the hell up woman! How do I turn you off? Here we are, my options bar. “Turn automatic assistant off” that sounds good.

James turns the voice off and sighs.

James: Ah, much better. Now I don’t have to worry about that damn wh*re anymore.

James continues down the road.
James: Damn that pole. F*cking woman, of all the days she had to meet it had to be during the foggiest day of the whole fricken month! And my head hurts like a b*tch!

[JC Denton]

did you write this?

its good, quite serial. Funny to.

[Lost_myth]

It was quite funny and you really developed this character well. It's funny how at first you wanna beat the crap out of him and then you want him to beat this system or whatever. I thought it was quite awesome. Wicked man. It was creepy how he licked that girl's spit. I like how he fell of the cliff and used up all his life, smarrrrrt.

I told you I would read it. The reason I didn't read it at first was because it said "mature audiences" which I thought meant adult or your age.

Where's the rest, now?

I want more.

[Jolie]

Weird stuff