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Nov 26th, 2002, 07:18 PM | #1 |
Now or Never
Joined: Jan 2002
Location: Zürich
Age: 42
Posts: 2,456
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Can you help me please :(
I'm sorry to bother you with these stupid questions, but I really need some suggestions!
Remember when some time ago I said there was a guy who was my best friend and then all of a sudden he started hating me? Well this guy is now at the hospital. He had a car accident last night and his conditions are really bad. I've got to know it thanks to friends of my friends, otherwise I couldn't be able to find out. I was shocked hearing this bad news. He was in the car with his sister and a friend of his sister, but thanks god they're not hurt. When I found what happened today, I've tried to go to the hospital to visit him, but his friends and his sister didn't allow me to see him, saying I'm not welcome there. I'm really worried, and I feel guilty too, because our friendship broke, and I'd like to do something for him, but as I said, I'm not welcome. What should I do? I feel so sad now |
Nov 26th, 2002, 07:27 PM | #2 |
Flame Champion
Joined: Oct 2002
Location: Canada
Age: 39
Posts: 158
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hey, i understand your situation...
you shoudn't let his sister and friends tell you that you are not welcome of coarse you are.. go there and if they get in the way walk right threw them... go see that guy i tell him you are there when he needs you even if you guys arent talking... make him feel special and help him out. he'll understand you care lots bout him and he'll wont be so stubborn (well dont know the guy but if i was this guy and you did that i wouldnt be mad at all) ask what happened and tell him its not his fault (if he was driving)... i cant tell you every to say if you really care for him dont worry you will find the words.... p.s this isnt a stupid question and why did you start to fight in the first place..
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Nov 26th, 2002, 07:29 PM | #3 |
Enemy or Ally?
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 4,023
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I'm sorry to hear that Hylas. Well....since they're not welcoming you in, even though he was the one who was being cruel to you in the beginning (am I right?), there's not much you can do. But, maybe you might be able to send him a card or do something in a way that says you're sorry about his situation and hope that he recovers feeling better?
Sorry, my suggestions are probably crap, I'm sorry. EDIT: Personally though, if he was the one being cruel to me, I'd be feeling guilty, but I would also be mad too. But that's just me.
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"You're a louse Roger Smith" ~ R. Dorothy Wayneright "Have a little priest" ~ Mrs. Lovett "Grim Reaper, you could not get the women? What was the problem? Didn't you reap them with your grim reaping equipment?" "I tried that but the women, they all know hopscotch" ~ Eddie Izzard You Can Help |
Nov 26th, 2002, 07:30 PM | #4 |
Flame Champion
Joined: Oct 2002
Location: Canada
Age: 39
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another suggestion is too spend lots of time when he is the hospital (being really nice) and he should respect you and he will probably do the same to you if you were hurt.... dont buy him anything sappy like flowers just going there to help out should be enough to make his day....
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Nov 26th, 2002, 07:32 PM | #5 |
Now or Never
Joined: Jan 2002
Location: Zürich
Age: 42
Posts: 2,456
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Since he's not in the condition to decide if I'm welcome or not, I necessarily have to face his familty and friends. It's like I'm alone aganist them, and they're not friendly at all. I would send a card meryl, but how do I know they let him read it?
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Nov 26th, 2002, 07:39 PM | #6 | |
Enemy or Ally?
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 4,023
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Quote:
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"You're a louse Roger Smith" ~ R. Dorothy Wayneright "Have a little priest" ~ Mrs. Lovett "Grim Reaper, you could not get the women? What was the problem? Didn't you reap them with your grim reaping equipment?" "I tried that but the women, they all know hopscotch" ~ Eddie Izzard You Can Help |
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Nov 26th, 2002, 07:42 PM | #7 |
Now or Never
Joined: Jan 2002
Location: Zürich
Age: 42
Posts: 2,456
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No no meryl, your suggestion is not useless. I find it very helpful. I might try to keep on going there and such things, and if I won't get any result, I'll try to ask someone else to go for me now and then. I'm still feeling a bit guilty for some reason, even if it's not my fault at all, but it's not the right moment to be childish I guess...
Thanks again a lot to you two |
Nov 26th, 2002, 07:45 PM | #8 |
Reached for the sky
Joined: May 2002
Location: The road less traveled
Age: 34
Posts: 2,465
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wow that is so not cool. but is his family like there with him all day long? or until visiting hour's are over? but you have to go thru his family i guess. and if they say you are not welcome go right thru them cause it's not their place to say your not welcome or not. the main thing is that you care for him and they should let you thru.
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Nov 26th, 2002, 07:48 PM | #9 |
Now or Never
Joined: Jan 2002
Location: Zürich
Age: 42
Posts: 2,456
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Maybe it's all my fault: if I was clever enough to solve the question before this happening I wouldn't be in so much trouble now
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Nov 26th, 2002, 07:48 PM | #10 |
pariah
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 2,385
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that's some sad stuff right there. Hopefully you find out about his condition soon.
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Nov 26th, 2002, 07:49 PM | #11 | |
Enemy or Ally?
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 4,023
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Quote:
Well, I hope that guy feels better and you shouldn't feel too guilty about this. Just try to have someone see him and update you of his status and hopefully once he recovers, he'll realize that you are still the very caring girl and hopefully things will work out between you two.
__________________
"You're a louse Roger Smith" ~ R. Dorothy Wayneright "Have a little priest" ~ Mrs. Lovett "Grim Reaper, you could not get the women? What was the problem? Didn't you reap them with your grim reaping equipment?" "I tried that but the women, they all know hopscotch" ~ Eddie Izzard You Can Help |
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Nov 26th, 2002, 07:53 PM | #12 | |
Now or Never
Joined: Jan 2002
Location: Zürich
Age: 42
Posts: 2,456
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Quote:
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Nov 26th, 2002, 07:58 PM | #13 | |
Enemy or Ally?
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 4,023
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Quote:
__________________
"You're a louse Roger Smith" ~ R. Dorothy Wayneright "Have a little priest" ~ Mrs. Lovett "Grim Reaper, you could not get the women? What was the problem? Didn't you reap them with your grim reaping equipment?" "I tried that but the women, they all know hopscotch" ~ Eddie Izzard You Can Help |
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Nov 26th, 2002, 07:59 PM | #14 | |
Useless Oracle™
Joined: Jan 2002
Location: Everywhere
Posts: 5,136
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Nov 26th, 2002, 08:08 PM | #15 |
Now or Never
Joined: Jan 2002
Location: Zürich
Age: 42
Posts: 2,456
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I don't know either if they will find the time to talk to me outside the hospital. It's like talking to a wall, really. You should hear them I'll try, maybe on the phone is better... But I don't know really what to do. It makes me feel helpless, to stay here without being able to do anything else than staring at the monitor...
Sorry for being a pain, and thanks for the replies. |
Nov 26th, 2002, 08:12 PM | #16 | |
Enemy or Ally?
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 4,023
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Quote:
Talking on the phone is good but bad too. They will likely keep hanging up on you if they hear you speak. I think talking with them face to face is better because you're right there and they can see your facial expressions. You shouldn't feel helpless; you made an effort to go see him and it was them who wanted to turn you away. It's not like you're not worried or you don't care at all...you do. So try not to be too stressed about this and just see how things go later on.
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"You're a louse Roger Smith" ~ R. Dorothy Wayneright "Have a little priest" ~ Mrs. Lovett "Grim Reaper, you could not get the women? What was the problem? Didn't you reap them with your grim reaping equipment?" "I tried that but the women, they all know hopscotch" ~ Eddie Izzard You Can Help |
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Nov 26th, 2002, 08:18 PM | #17 |
Useless Oracle™
Joined: Jan 2002
Location: Everywhere
Posts: 5,136
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Face to face would be better, I agree, but you know them and you know what's better in this case. If you feel more comfortable to not explain things in face, you should do as you wish. But anyway, they could refuse anyway, both on the phone and face to face, as they refused to let you in. That's why you don't have to feel bad if this happens, because you can't do anything else than try and see what happens. You can either ask a friend of yours to talk, in case they still keep on refusing you. That could be less effective maybe, but it's better than nothing.
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Nov 26th, 2002, 08:22 PM | #18 |
Flame Champion
Joined: Oct 2002
Location: Canada
Age: 39
Posts: 158
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if you really cant do anything cuz of his family, you should do something to get your mind of this situation... sitting there thinking about what to do isnt gonna make it better go out and have fun with some other friends then in a day or two go back and try again, im not telling you to do this its just like a back up plan...
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Nov 26th, 2002, 08:25 PM | #19 | |
Now or Never
Joined: Jan 2002
Location: Zürich
Age: 42
Posts: 2,456
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Quote:
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Nov 26th, 2002, 09:27 PM | #20 |
Useless Oracle™
Joined: Jan 2002
Location: Everywhere
Posts: 5,136
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Of course thinking about it all the time won't help, but you can't force yourself to do otherwise in these cases, so ugh... just try to keep yourself occupied in the meantime. It's not a great suggestion, but it helps a lot
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