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[happy_doughnut]

Children. How you love them. How they annoy me. -__-;

I think we've all seen, more than once, that child and mother at the mall, supermarket, street, park or what have you that is kicking, squirming and yelling at the top of their lungs, with the mother nearby screaming at him/her to stop, but to no avail.

Good riddance.

What are your takes on how to discipline a child? Are you one to think that a well earned spanking is necessary now and then, or do you believe a good punishment will do the job?

Furthermore, what are your thoughts on children nowadays? Are the new ways of disclipline better or are they worse? If you spank a child, is it child abuse? If you don't, does it mean that you don't care?

Personally, children that don't listen to the parent irritate me so. In fact, there are few things I can think of that annoy me more. I think that nowadays, children are being raised with too much liberalness, and this I truly believe to be a terrible thing. It's true that I don't have a child of my own (and don't intend to!), but I do have two little nieces that practically live at my house. One of them in particular makes me so mad! She's the type of child that listens to no one. If one tells her do something, she won't. If one tells her to stop, she won't and will inclusively begin to cry. Now, I don't blame this on her, but on the parenting she is receiving. Being only 5 and already so rebelious, the future thoughts of her are frightening. Her mother won't discipline her and neither will her father. Instead, they run to her and comfort her and blame everything on other people, claiming they made her "mad." Mad?! Mad?! Oh, god. *shakes head*

I strongly believe that a child needs to be taught how to behave from the very beginning, because if you wait, then it may very well be too late; just try handling a rebelious teenager. Some say that this all has to do with the times, and I must say I disagree: A good disciplinary parent will be a good one regardless of the time, and a bad overly tolerant parent will be a bad one regardless of the time, too.

I don't know - I just can't stand seeing so much disrespect towards parental figures; I remember I wasn't raised like this, and by all means I'm not all that old.

Children seem to be headed in a bad direction with the seemingly poor parenting skills of today, and this really is a big shame.

[IcyMourdor]

Just looking at this year's high school grads and next year's, I can assume where their respect lies. The gutter.

Although I will never hit my child, I'm not above taking away his freedom. You misbehave with friends, you get grounded. Goodbye friends.

However, that is just me. A great majority of my friends, even my last gf, said I would make a great husband and parent. I cannot speak for the millions of parents out there who are too lenient/strict.

There is a lot of pressure out there on the parents to raise their children to the best they can be. Some parents would turn a blind eye to murder, some would beat their child bloody for forgeting to take out the trash. Its hard to find the nice middle with a lot of people.

Now, Congress has stepped in, adding laws about parents can't be "abusive" to their children. Thats perfect, however, even though I'm one to have full faith in the law (considering going into law for a degree), it still gets manipulated. I read an article about a father who was sent to jail (jail = 1 year or less) for spanking his child. Twenty years ago, you would have never seen anything like that. The child turned him in for physical abuse. Hard for parents to punish their children if they fear going to jail; or even prison.

Until things get better, we are stuck looking the younger generations become more rebelious and disrespectful. Blame the children, blame the parents, both are at fault depending on the circumstance.

Just raise your children right, thats all we can really do.

[Hyuga]

just be pacient is to more for me. I was a desperated kid but i know these, is just rebelious and ever be the same.

[Infernal Mass]

I hate kids..but before you all think that's a terrible thing to say..let me tell you all a story about a careless,meddling little bastard and an innocent brand new playstation 2..

on second thought just thinking about it bring a tear to my eye..

so, to make a long story short; when i bought my ps2 back when it launched here in America it almost broke on account of a little kid..

it still makes weird noises when i eject the disc tray.. everytime i hear it (which isn't that often but still often enough) i'm reminded of how careless and destructive those little bastards can be.

This is what all kids need right here:

https://www.pocketbook.co.uk/images/c...discipline.jpg

every kid should have a copy on hand at all times..

[Hyuga]

well i agree with your coment.
The only is kick the as.. and more when they touch the things in this case your ps2

[goodman]

The children of my girlfriends have literally been the difference between whether or not i had a permanent relationship with them. Yes, children need to be disciplined, and with spankings occasionally. But its when they do something that is truely out of line, otherwise a stiff reprimand should work. Oh, and HD, yes, starting from day one, discipline and a respect for their parents and adults should be instilled. Your children and their children will really love you for it some day...

[Chara]

Yea, I have babysay my neighbor's daughter many times and man... its a pain in the ass dealing with her. She is about 5 years old and I know half the crap she does is to annoy me.

Ok, one time I was sitting in my room playing my dreamcast with her watching. I left her in my room while I left to get something to drink. Ok... big mistake. Came back in my room and everything was on the floor. My Cds, tennis balls, everything. My other mistake was getting colored juice. Of course she asked for osme and grabbed it. NExt thing you know it, red juice all over my floor.

I know how to disclipline kids myself but this isnt my child. So if I did something, her mother might get mad. The going in the corner thing doesnt work with kids anymore so what I usually do is toss them in the closet for an hour or so. Well, that is what I do with my little cousin, at least.

As for my children (which will be far... far... FAR... in the future), I will have no problem hitting them with a belt. Hell, that is how I was punished and I'm nicer than Richard Simmons after drinking 50 Pina Coladas.

[Piggle_humsy]

Well seeing as I've worked with kids all my life I like to think I'm pretty good with them, also that I'm pretty patient.
My mates kid is 6 and she is the worst child i've ever come across, her mother has let her get away with murder in the past, recently she has realised her mistake and has started 'trying' to discipline her but It doesn't seem to be working because the child really doesn't listen to her, I can understand why her mother has spoilt her as she lost her first baby to cot death when she was 10 months old, but she didn't stop to think about the consequences in later life, she will play up hell when she's a teenager and her mum won't be able to do a thing.

One example of how bad she is:
Recently when I was there we went out to get some fried chicken and when we were walking back home the child asked if she could carry her box of chicken, so her mum agreed but told her if she looks like she's going to drop it she'll take it back until we get home, so after about a minute we looked at her and she wasn't holding the box properly and her chicken was almost falling out onto the floor, so her mum took it back, and at that very moment the child threw herself on the ground and started kicking and screaming, you have to understand this wasn't a very nice neighbourhood, it's like the bad side of town, the floor is filthy with who knows what and the streets are filled with weirdo's, it was like a saturday night so it was packed with people and here this child was on the floor kicking her feet about and screaming at the top of her lungs, you would think someone was trying to kill her, so her mum said just keep walking and ignore her and she'll get up, we walked but she never got up so her mum had to scrape her up off the floor and drag her home.
I was so embarrased.
This is just a small taste of what she's like everytime she doesnt get her way!

I like to think of smacking a child as an extreme last resort, and I definitely would never ever belt my child that is just so very wrong.
When I worked as a Live-in Nanny for one family they had no rules set for the kids, they were given crisps and sweets to take to bed, their mother used to let them play in their bedroom when they went to bed till they were tired (which meant sometimes they were up till 10/11 o'clock at night, they'd take hours eating their dinner just to stay up longer, they'd get up at 5am and constantly knock at their mums door asking for food (which she would let them have just to get rid of them) it goes on and on.... well when I went to work there that all changed and while I was working there I felt as though I really made a difference for the better, they no longer were allowed food to take up to bed, they ate their dinner quickly and quietly, once they were sent to bed I would read to them for one hour then they would sleep, I even got them washing their hands after they used the loo, I changed their whole lifestyle, I think I even made a dent on the parents habits, lol.

The older child (7) used to have the most awful tantrums and while I was there I managed to control that aswell, without any force, she would either go to her room, get grounded, lose some luxury or sit on the stairs.
By the end of it most fo the time when she started to get angry she would either take herself out of the room to calm down or explain to the person that was annoying her (usually her sister) why she was annoying her and ask her to stop.

At one stage I bought some stickers and drew up a behaviour chart which worked well, their mother worked with me and we decided on giving them 10p a day if they were good so if they were good all week they would have 50p which totalled to £2 a month, which is alot for kids, if they were good and at the end of the month they would be able to buy something of their choice with it, like penny sweets ect.
So I believe that you should always try other options and leave smacking as the last resort because mostly what you teach a child by smacking them is that hitting people is an ok thing to do.

Piggle
x x x x

[Deathwatchz]

personally, i dont think that hitting kids is a good thing beyond a point. i was one of the abused kids, and i turned out ok, but im gonna be fucked up in the head for the rest of my life. i think spanking with a bare hand and not hitting to the point of bruising is fine, but no smacking, punching, belts, etc. also, one thing that can make a kid wish he hadnt done anything is lectures. my dad used to lecture me for an hour, and i would pray he would just spank the hell out of me and let me go to my room. either way, there are gonna be the kids who wont respond to this. also, you have to back it up with TLC, or it doesnt matter. there can be kids who get whipped with extension cords, but if they dont get any compassion, they are gonna be bada$$#$ anyway. oh well, im not gonna have any kids any time soon, and i hope that the situation isnt worse than it is now. next thing you know, you'll call your kid an idiot, and go to jail for mental abuse.

[Redpyramidhead]

I was quite the brat when I was a kid. I admit it. It wasn't because my parents didn't try. They did try, but I was a sneaky little bastard. But other times it had more to do with me being emotionally disturbed. I would be so distraught sometimes and my parents could sense this. Being caring people, they were confused as to what to do with me. They didn't know whether to discipline me half the time or give me a hug. Yes, I took advantage of this at times, but sometimes I didn't even know I was doing it (yes, I was quite the child from hell.) It is hard for some parents to be able to decide which to do for each and every situation and I think the sign of a confused parent in this situation is not the sign of a bad one, but a caring one.

It is harder to be a kid than ever before. It is harder to be a parent than ever before. It is only going to get harder. My point is that things tend to happen themselves due to patterns in human behavior and not everything is avoidable. The trick is finding the balance in between so you can have a better inkling as to what your child needs for each situation. Nothing is ever black and white when it comes to parenting.

Also, sometimes when a child misbehaves there is more to the picture than a simple behavioral problem. Other times, when a child never misbehaves, you should probably be wondering wondering if there is something very wrong with them, as well... and their parents.

A child's behaviour at the age of 7 or something so young is really no way to tell whether they are going to grow up to be disrespectful people or not or be problem teenagers. So, to all of you thinking OMG at the "appalling" behavior of some children, remember they are still kids and are not lost causes.

BTW, I think we could all learn a little bit from Piggle! Those are some serious skills

Oh, and I turned out fine, myself.

_RED_ stuff